You likely have an increased sense that I am either arrogant or disappointed in you....
- If you want to quit, but still smoke cigarettes. I am not talking to you if you enjoy tobacco and have no plan to stop smoking. More importantly, this section applies to other vices in life beyond just cigarettes. I'm addressing those who "want but can't" quit anything. A desire to stop destructive behavior is a good start. However, your inability to actually quit concerns me. It means you are losing a battle, due to a lack of willpower and discipline. Temptation is strong. And while I have never smoked cigarettes, I absolutely guarantee you that if I did, I could quit. Probably cold turkey too. I don't care what experts say about chemical dependence. I wouldn't let that habit rule my life. NO WAY. Bragging? Yes, a bit. But there are plenty of those who have done the same. Leave excuses out of this fight. If you want to quit but still smoke cigarettes, you probably lose lots of battles in life by citing excuses.
- If you don't live up to your word. My wife learned early on in our relationship that I don't use the words "I promise." Everything I say is a promise. Your words are important to me. My words are important to you. If you say you will complete a task or be somewhere at a certain time, I expect you to follow it up. This is a reputation to cherish. Say it, then do it. It's that simple. If you cannot commit, then say so. I'd rather hear about an uncertainty or maybe than being surprised with an unfulfilled promise. And if I catch you backing out of your word, your name goes into a column of those who I can't trust. And it will take YOU to work your way into the other column. If you don't live up you your word, you cannot be relied on.
- If you don't wear your seatbelt. If you don't see the value in your own life, then why the heck should I? No need to continue.....
- If you cheat on your spouse. There are few choices in life that are as serious or lasting as marriage. Though, it's been said it's one of the easiest decisions ever. If you cheat on your husband or wife, I can only assume you are a cheater, liar, and fraud in many other aspects of your life. Trust is not a once-in-a-while quality. Your infidelity permeates you. If you cheat on your spouse, why should I believe in you?
- If you stay on the ground when knocked down. Resilience is a very positive trait. I don't care how many times you are beaten. I care about how you react after the failure. I probably will actually put more value on those who lose and try again than on those who have always won. I want to see how people respond to obstacles and derailments. If you stay on the ground when knocked down, I will not draft you onto any team of mine.
- If you refuse to go camping. I'm quite OK with the occasional self-pampering. But if you deny yourself the opportunity to live the occasional existence as a survivalist, I question your ability to endure hardships in life. You are likely the same one who throws a fit at power outages, imperfections in hotel pillows, variances in home temperature, and elevators being out-of-service. Campers tend to have a better attitude towards the minor inconveniences that life throws at us. If you can cook over a flame or sleep under the stars, you can endure some of the breakdowns in technology and luxury. Camping is planned practice for the zombie apocalypse. If you refuse to go camping, you aren't taking a stake in your own physical survival.
- If you don't read books. I said READ, not listen to books on tape. And I said BOOKS, not People or Cosmo magazine. And I don't mean Nicholas Sparks or suspenseful novels either. What I am talking about is non-fiction writings that teach lessons: biographies of US Presidents or inventors, tales of hardships or exploration, accounts of war or tragedy, techniques for leadership or innovation, debates on conventional wisdom or religion, the Bible. I thirst for knowledge, not merely entertainment. If you read these things, you take pride in your personal development. And I probably like that about you. Calling anything you can purchase at the grocery check-out line "reading material" is an insult to those who try to better themselves through written word. If you don't read books, you don't see value in other people's experiences.
- If you don't believe in God. God is. True. There is a better chance of rock and metal ore evolving into a Ferrari sports car than a cellular blob evolving into a human being. Evidence of God's existence is all around us. Ignoring that is complete blindness. If you don't believe in God, you are dead.
I make no apology for how you feel when you read this post. What I do promise you is help, guidance, and assistance in putting an end to any of the above personality or behavior deficiencies. Deficiencies? Yes. You are missing something in life if any of the above statements fit you. And I make no concessions.
I live life according to a set of guidelines and rules. If I didn't think the above list was important, I wouldn't share it.
The good news: Life has do-overs. If you want to make change, start soon....